Why do I want him when he’s not good for me?

It is an inherent feeling that a lot of people have to pursue what they want even if it’s not good for them.

If you think you can change him, you are in for a huge surprise.

1. He’s in denial

Denial is a common response to emotional distress. It can be triggered by fear, insecurity, or a lack of emotional availability. People in denial may also struggle with self-esteem issues or be prone to internal conflict. They may find it difficult to express their feelings or share information with others.

Guys often deny their feelings because they are afraid of being rejected or seen as weak. They are also worried that they will be perceived as insensitive if they show their emotions. This is why they tend to send mixed signals and make it confusing for women.

Continuing to date a man who consistently denies his feelings can be emotionally draining and frustrating. However, you can minimize his negative impact on your life by focusing on your own emotional well-being and setting healthy boundaries. It is also important to understand his perspective so that you can navigate the situation with empathy. This will help you avoid frustration and confusion in the future.

2. He’s in love with you

When you love someone, you want to give them everything that you have. This doesn’t just mean material things, it means your time, your attention, and most importantly, your heart.

When a man loves you, he doesn’t just look at you with that look of lust and desire, it’s a whole different kind of look. It’s a look of serenity and inner calm that is reserved only for you.

When a guy truly loves you, he makes your life better. He wants to see you succeed in your goals, dreams, and aspirations. He listens intently to your problems and tries his best to find solutions that will work for both of you. He misses you when you are away and goes out of his way to keep you close. He doesn’t try to control you or your boundaries and respects your life. He treats you as a priority. He wants you and only you. This is the true definition of love.

3. He’s insecure

All of us have insecurities, but when they are a major part of your relationship, it can be toxic. For example, he might be jealous of your friends, especially male ones, and he might check your social media to make sure you aren’t spending time with anyone else.

He also might be insecure about himself and he may make comparisons to his own height, weight, or other qualities that he values in himself. He might even compare himself to his exes and think that they never really loved him.

He might talk about his past relationships a lot and blame them on everyone but himself, saying that they cheated on him or that they were abusive in some way. He may also be emotional volatile and get very angry about the smallest things that upset him. This is a sign that he isn’t secure in his own relationship. Usually, insecure men will blame their feelings on something outside the relationship rather than face them head-on.

4. He’s unsure of his feelings

He treats you like a bug under a microscope, examining every unconscious gesture and innocent word for hidden meaning. It hurts to feel patronized, but he makes you want to defend yourself. His razor-sharp accusations always find new flaws to pile onto the ones you already knew about, and you’re left feeling exhausted.

If he avoids discussing the future, such as marriage or children, it may indicate that he is unsure of his feelings for you. If he also tends to put his work, friends, or family before you, that’s a sign that he doesn’t view you as his priority.

A healthy relationship requires both partners to make it a priority. While you wait for him to figure things out, focus on your career, hobbies, and friendships. That will help you regain your self-esteem and confidence so that when he finally does decide to commit, it will be because he truly wants to. Then you can both enjoy a long term, loving relationship.